We's in California

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

These houses suck.

You may not realize it, but these pictures were actually taken from my car, it's true. Now it's not that I don't care about the quality of the pictures on this blog, it's more of a general feeling of malaise mixed with indifference towards the blog as a whole that has been in direct conflict with my motivation in keeping it up to speed. But nevertheless the struggle continues and I fight on, pumping out observation after marginally insightful observation about LA and why it can be and usually is ...... rediculous.

So, the houses. Despite the impressively poor quality of the pictures I managed to get of these houses due to the fact that I was driving, one can still get a feeling of how, ummm, bad and average they are. I guess they're big. But not that big. In the pictures below, that sign at the front of the development used to say "Starting in the 950,000 thousands" a few weeks ago, but these babies must be going like hotcakes because the developers now think they can squeeze a cool million out of the owners to be! This development is just off the 101 by Los Virgenes Road. For those who don't know where this is (95% of anyone who reads this) it's basically the outskirts of LA on the way to Malibu and is quite far from anything remotely cool. I just can't believe that's what a million dollar house looks like now. In Winnipeg I think I saw somebody asking that much for East Kildonan. Am I wrong? Am I wrong here?

Now I don't think everyone has to live in an art-space downtown loft with a rooftop garden and a box of acid jazz records on the windowsill, but these houses are just terrible. It takes a total lack of imagination to build these in the first place, then a lack of integrity to sell them for a million dollars. I believe that every hard workin' family man that has bought one of these houses wakes up at 3 am on the first night in the house and has a panic attack when he realizes what he has just purchased and how much he purchased it for. Then he sneezes and the crappy new drywall falls off the bedroom wall and now is having a heart attack. Then he listens to Massive Attack which puts him back to sleep. Then he wakes up the next morning and works for 60 years and passes the mortgage on to his kids.

Next week I'm going to break down real life surfers into their different phyla. From how does someonethat big find, nevermind get into, a wetsuit guy to look at my face and how I'm trying not to look really excited by the fact I actually caught a wave guy (that's me),
to no seriously, you are 260 pounds and shouldn't be able to surf guy. It's going to be detailed and mostly true. Bye!


  • What's sad is that these aren't even the worst ones.

    By Blogger Andrew, at May 04, 2006  

  • Yeah, It reminds me of your april 18 post about the condo (and I use that term loosely) in sherman oaks. Frozen dinner indeed!

    By Blogger Gareth, at May 04, 2006  

  • gareth we lost our homeopener, 15-13. The bat is sweet, the worth mayhem. its a composite. there is a new team in the league, the masterbattters. Even more original is the team in the div. above us called the Chronic Masterbatters. Almost as good as the Roughriders.

    By Anonymous clitke, at May 04, 2006  

  • How's the surfing going? my inlaws told a story of a co-worker who was living in toronto and sold their shanty shack, a small bungalow, for 750,000 and moved to winnipeg and got a mansion along the river for the same price. retarded.

    By Anonymous clitke, at May 05, 2006  

  • Gillian and I were looking at houses on-line today and found the perfect one in Wolseley for just 129,900 (and no, we're not looking to buy...just dreaming and covetting other peoples houses while we pay off student loans for the next 3-5 years!). This house was ridiculously nice with a balcony and huge loft-style attic and everything. In Winnipeg, anything's L.A. we'd be hobos.

    Also, the first house in Winnipeg's history sold over the 3 million dollar mark last of the Aspers sold their house on Wellington Cres.

    Gareth, keep up the blog...I check-in regularly and it's always enlightening and entertaining...No malaise here!

    By Blogger Steve & Gillian, at May 06, 2006  

  • Yeah Gareth, keep blogging because you do it really well. No kidding. I love reading this thing.

    As to your comment on the applicability of Red Dawn, you are right, your version WOULD be more accurate. But the Red Dawn isn't about being accurate, just interesting, thought-provoking, and Commie-smashing.

    By Anonymous Blade, at May 06, 2006  

  • Steve. I think I know where that house is. On Fawcette beside the apartment building, right? I know a girl from the building who knows the former owner and was thinking about buying it but apparently it has been purchased by guess who....people from Vancouver. They offered quite a bit more than list, of course! Those bastards, they'll probably cut it up and rent it out.

    By Blogger Gareth, at May 08, 2006  

  • You are right, Gareth. The address is 50 Fawcette and it is conditionally sold as per agent, financing pending.

    By Anonymous M, at May 09, 2006  

  • Damn Vancouverites flaunting their wealth all over the place! Pretty soon a cool-mill won't get you a house in St.Norbert.

    By Blogger Steve & Gillian, at May 09, 2006  

  • Yeah, it's sad, isn't it. We harbour dreams of moving to Huntington or Sunset Beach, but it is not to be because not only do you have to pay $500,000 for a condominium and the $250 a month HOA fees, you also have to pay $5,200 a year in land lease.

    We're still determined to leave Van Nuys but it looks like we will be accessing L.A. County from the 5 or the 57, not the 405.

    By Anonymous Dave the Ubergeek, at May 11, 2006  

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