We's in California

Monday, February 27, 2006

Mo-ka-la-ka-li-ki, come on you wanna...

So the So-Cal surf scene is pretty lame. Some places, according to some people, if you're not a local you shouldn't be on the the specific beach in question. There are several criteria that disqualify you as being a local, but these same criteria do qualify you however to have your ass kicked if you try surf there and are as follows:
1) If you have to drive down a certain road to get to a certain beach.
2) If you have to drive a car at all to get to the beach
3) If you make more than minimum wage
4) If your name's not Curtis,

Etc, etc. I haven't experienced the wrath of these idiots but the few times I've been there haven't been many people around. If you look around on the web on surfing newsgroups and the like you'll find it all there. I think with other board sports (skate-snow) this mentality exists, but it's not nearly as bad as surfing. Anyway, I still suck really bad and when I do actually stand on my board it's about 2 seconds before I "eat the foam". I was so sure my skateboarding skillz would carryover to surfing....oh wait they did.

Sadly my daily weekday trips to Calabasas will be coming to an end as our office is moving to Woodland Hills this weekend. The upside is that I'll be able to take public transport (peace be upon it) to work, meaning that now both Dayna and I will not rely on cars to get to work, and this makes us feel pretty darn good about ourselves.

Yet there are downsides as well. I will be much further than the 1/2 mile from Nick and Jessica's house on Newly-Weds than I used to be, I will never be able to tell people that I work in the town with the first outdoor smoking ban in history (which comes into effect soon), and I won't ever get to hang out again at the Coffee Bean with Winston from from Ghostbusters 2. (He's the black one.) Oh well. I mean Oh Well I don't mind leaving Calabasas, not Oh Well there was a black Ghostbuster. But Oh Well.

Dayna's family is arriving today. That can mean only one thing for me and Al: The In 'N Out Burger. It's an American burger chain that's really good...with a REALLY bad name.


  • When I lived in Cali (no where near Nick and Jessica) I REALLY liked 'In 'n' Out Burgers'. Now, are they the ones with scripture on the bottom of their cups?

    By Anonymous Gillian, at February 27, 2006  

  • It's interesting that you used to work only 1/2 mile from Nick and Jessica's... it is also interesting that you used to live close to another celebrity:
    Also, Chris works with "The Mecca" Shane Madison... the very same one that we saw at the Broadway Community Centre that time. Wrestling. Indeed.

    By Anonymous Jeremy, at February 27, 2006  

  • And apparently this dirtbag tried to tell Chris that he was never at the BCC, which is CRAP because we saw him there! Why would he deny prancing around in blue spandex yelling at 11 year old aboriginal youths and 5 laughing college boys?

    By Blogger Gareth, at February 27, 2006  

  • Apparently it's really easy to change "In 'N Out Burger" into "In 'N Out urge" if you're into vandalism or whatever.

    Some guy told me that once.

    By Anonymous Chris, at February 27, 2006  

  • Yeah, In-N-Out. That's Cali, baby. I prefer Fatburger myself, but I will brook no criticism of the mighty In-N-Out. Look up the "secret menu." It's not really a secret, it's all over the internet, (Google it for some fun) but it is true that none of these things are posted on the menu board at the restaurant. But all the workers there know what they are.

    I like me a "Protein Style" my own self, but it would be fun to go in there and order up "A 3x6, animal style, extra grilled onions, with animal fries well done and a Neapolitan shake."

    By Blogger Scott, at February 28, 2006  

  • this surfboard culture sounds kind of like Cousin's Deli - list of qualifications for acceptance of daily consumption:
    a.) did you drive here?
    2.) do you have any pot?
    d.) Do you make less than minimum wage?
    3.) are those new clothes that your wearing?

    ha, its funny, not true but funny.

    By Anonymous clitke, at February 28, 2006  

  • 4.) Did you just spend 20 minutes when you got to the office this morning standing around a computer with 4 other guys watching funny videos from a funny video website?
    e.) Yes. Yes I did. I think that qualifies me for a US Green Card doesn't it?

    By Blogger Gareth, at March 02, 2006  

  • r.) standing around talking about nothing at continuous intervals througout the day. Ali g is all the rage.

    5.( Is that a hummer in the parking lot downstairs? The hummer goes with her whale tail, i saw it yesterday while i was going up the stairs behind her, yikes.

    By Anonymous clitke, at March 02, 2006  

  • Kurt Cameron, eat your heart out!

    Damn it feels good to be a gangsta'!

    By Blogger Steve & Gillian, at March 03, 2006  

  • kurt or kirk? what exactly is a megachurch? do they shop at megacenters and powercenters?

    By Anonymous clitke, at March 05, 2006  

  • That's a good point you make, Chris. When I originally wrote that I Googled it to see if it was kurt or kirk. Now, however, when I try Googling both I get pictures of the same guy...apparently he goes by both names...but i think kirk is more right by the looks of it.

    By Anonymous steve, at March 05, 2006  

  • Steve, this weekend we drove through a us army base town on the way to San Diego. Lots of brushcuts and shirt that said (in a spinoff from Fedex) "Army Corps: When it absolutely, positively has to be destroyed overnight." I though that was pretty funny. War is super sweet.

    By Blogger Gareth, at March 06, 2006  

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