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Monday, October 30, 2006

Mattresses. On Kester.

The recent arrival of mattresses to the sidewalks of Van Nuys has sparked alot of debate in the community. Many children have dissappeared in the night, and the number of mattresses lurking in the shadows grows with every hour. The violent nature of Kester Ave sidewalk couches, though they have known to be even deadly at times, pales in comparison to the Kester Ave mattress. Here we see the cunning nature of the sidewalk mattress as it hides behind the "bushes" (aka: street weeds) across from our apartment: lurking, waiting.....hungry.

Note the shiny BMW beside the abandoned lot, rotting furniture, and gang spray painted fence. It's more Los Angeles than Los Angeles.

And here's a picture of illegal immigrants getting a ticket for selling flowers on the side of the highway for cash. I suppose the previous sentence probably makes you angry no matter which side of the debate you're on. Talk amongst yourselves I guess. I just lay it out there....


Tommorrow, being Halloween, will not be as good at it usually is back in Winnipeg. I will definitely miss all the obscure and sarcastic costumes everyone comes up with, and I know that the short tight green shorts I manage to work into my costume each year will be sorely missed as well. But in keeping with the sarcastic spirit of a Winnipeg Halloween party, I will be going to the office as a Mac user. "Messy" hair, factory-ripped jeans, stubble, white headphones, etc. I do not expect it to go over well, and neither do I expect anyone there to get it. But that's ok because you know, I'll be working on my blog, editing a skate video, mixing some acid jazz music on my laptop, you know whatever.

8 Comments:

  • You think no one will get the Mac user costume?
    Try going to Elwood's dressed as Andrew W.K. A lot more "huh?" and a lot less "awesome!" than I expected.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at October 30, 2006  

  • Gareth,
    I sharded today.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at November 01, 2006  

  • Again Chris? And isn't it "sharted"?

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at November 01, 2006  

  • Trust me, more people got your andrew w.k. than they got our dressing up as blane and andie from pretty in pink. next year i'm going to go as the main character from my favourite book in grade 3, Chocolate Fever.

    Gareth, two things:
    1. Is it just me or is every single one of those illegal immigrants planning on killing you?!
    2. If you go walking around in public with those white headphones you most definitely have a 1 in 9 chance of getting capped.

    By Blogger Steve & Gillian, at November 01, 2006  

  • We went to a halloween street party last night, best costume: The 2 main characters from The Birds. Worst costume: The thousands of guys dressed in drag.
    Regarding the two things:
    1) No, I don't think they're trying to kill me (except when they run red lights 4 seconds too late when I'm on my bike and then yell at me in Spanglish). Then again there is a statistically proven higher chance that they are trying to kill me, unless the interweb is lying to me....you know with the tubes an all that. But they really do piss me off because in a span of 20 years they've turned Van Nuys into a disgusting cesspool from what was apparently a great American working class neighborhood.

    2) Remember when people were getting capped for their Air Jordans? That started it all. The Air Jordan brand is still huge here, it's really weird. I see new cars in LA with the big Air Jordan sticker on it. Still. Air Jordan.

    By Blogger Gareth, at November 01, 2006  

  • Gareth, shouldn't you have fuzzed out the faces of those illegals? When the next government check comes, they might get internet and hunt you down.

    By Blogger bren j., at November 02, 2006  

  • Here I was, racing through an airport, doing that corporate America 16 hour work day thing , when I saw the CNN headline on one of the hanging Samsungs; "Mexicans Against Fence". I had no idea what the context or the content was and lo and behold, I get home, log on the blog and am presented with up to the minute pictorial evidence. You are the best.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at November 02, 2006  

  • Obscure Halloween costumes? Got you covered.

    In high school, a friend went as an obscure character with no lines from a Federal Express commercial. He also had a shopping cart covered with papers which was "The Paper Blob" chasing him. From another Federal Express commercial.

    Some time later, I went to a party in New York City where a guy was dressed as the Federal Budget Deficit. How did he do that, you ask? He was draped in blank checks made out for billions of dollars and covered in RED TAPE. Geddit?

    By Blogger Scott, at November 12, 2006  

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